What to put underneath the tree…



Christmas traditions are not just for humans. My cat always gets her own advent calendar and stocking (this is perfectly normal), and Pets At Home, every crazy cat lady’s favourite shop, even sells gift bags specifically for cats. See, it’s completely normal.

But if your cat is too classy for Pets At Home’s excellent Catnip Mrs Owl Christmas Toy, Etsy sells cotton shirt collars for business cats. I have no idea what use a cat could possibly have for a shirt collar, but it’s the thought that counts…



Whether he’s Rover, Scooby-Doo, Santa’s Little Helper, may his soul rest in peace Brian, or god forbid Scrappy Doo, tis’ the season to spoil your four-pawed companion rotten! 

What could make for a better gift than this adorable canine cracker? Complete with tennis ball and treats- let your dog dig in! The best part? It’s only £2.50 from Pets At Home!





Mums are hard-pressed in the holidays and by the time Christmas day has been and gone, with all the related faff of Turkey-cooking, present-wrapping (and hiding from nosey children!) and family argument soothing, any Mum will love some pamper time, and with so many places to procure perfumed products, why look further than York for the perfect present?

The Yorkshire Soap Company’s Fresh and Fruity Home Made Botanical Soap Bar Gift Box smells divine and will help your Mum unwind at ease after the stress of the big day and at £13.00 is a bargain.


Considering I’ve never had a brother, I’m probably not the best to ask, but it’s difficult to go wrong with box sets and I know few boys indeed who don’t enjoy Family Guy. If you want to go the extra mile though, splash out on getting him the first Five Seasons – they’re only £20.00 on Amazon, and to be honest it gets a bit rubbish after the Fifth Season so if anything, in being stingy you’re doing them a favour!



The dad is the biggest Christmas enigma out there. That’s why it’s best to split your budget across a few presents so it looks like you’ve gotten him a lot and he knows you actually care. The best thing is to combine what all dads love: 1) a stand-ups DVD (all dads love to laugh, the ruder the comedian the better), 2) a mug with an awful joke on it (dads never make good jokes: everyone knows that) and 3) chocolate or alcohol (this really depends on your father’s indulgence of choice…).


For my potential prezzie I picked out: Sean Locke’s Purple Van Man on DVD (£14.00), No I Won’t Keep Calm and You Can Fuck Off Mug (£7.00) and a large bag of Minstrels (£3.00).

My top tip for getting everyone Christmas presents though? Get out and go mad in the shops – it’s Christmas, and you don’t need to feel guilty about splurging because you’re splurging for other people: a Shopaholic’s Dream!


If you and your sister are a similar size, kill two birds with one stone and buy her clothes so you can double your wardrobe! With this ulterior motive in mind, it should be easy to choose a present- just pick something you want. If she catches on to your genius plan, get her something vaguely Christmas-themed, like this Reindeer jumper from Topshop so it at least looks like a present.


Screen Shot 2013-11-28 at 22.38.47Housemate

It’s probably a good idea to do Secret Santa with your housemates, especially if you’re in a house of 20, like I was in first year. If you get someone you’re really close with, go with a joke present. A hilarious present is infinitely more valuable than something which might actually be useful. But if you have to buy for someone you don’t know that well, it’s probably better to play it safe. New Look has a good range of cheap Christmas presents, including this lunchbox, which comes in yellow and pink, for £5.99.