Somewhere Somehow is the fourth studio album from the Floridian pop punk band We the Kings. Despite making quite an impact in certain circles with their self-titled 2007 album, they have since failed to take the momentum of a Billboard top 70 hit and transform it into substantial popularity. Despite such little success being a hallmark of theirs for several years now, latest offering Somewhere Somehow has managed to take lack of momentum to a new level. Perhaps if I had been listening to an album by an unheard of American boy band I would not have been surprised; but as I was listening to the once innovative rockers We the Kings, I could not quite believe my ears.
Somewhere Somehow is potentially the worst record I have ever had the misfortune of listening to. I would attempt to highlight songs but I honestly could not bring myself to listen to it more than once, and every track just merged into one endless length of tedium. This is not the quirky tongue in cheek guitar-cum-pop punk We the Kings fans will be used to – this record is full of electronic drums, clichéd lyrics (used without a flicker of irony) and ultimately lazily produced music. I really liked We the Kings and happy to see them in Nottingham back in 2009 – they were an amazing, visually and aurally exciting band to witness. The shitwreck I hear now is almost completely unrecognisable. The weird thing is that their transition to Metro Station rip off appears like a conscious one. Nothing this shit just happens. True shit of this magnitude requires intent. Their descent is a tragic one, the upbeat party boys fading from a jovial band of long haired drop-outs that brought us the ridiculous YouTube backstage band diary ‘the Kings carriage’ to something resembling a shiny Kid Rock. They seem to have become polished, commercialised and moulded to appeal to the lowest common denominator. If I imagine them now I think of a group of lads dressed by stylists, sitting on stools in a row and getting up to perform a rehearsed dance routine.
There is literally absolutely nothing to say about the music. What music? The auto tuned, drum machined, clichéd drivel that is this album. Is that music? Perhaps, but not music to anyone who has any modicum of perception of what quality is would ever willingly classify it as such. I think there is a song at the end which has some piano in it. I think. I can’t really remember. I was too busy trying to stop myself from chewing a hole in my desk to prevent this sub-standard music from destroying all my higher functions. The thing that really hurts is this band used to be good, they used to be creative and they could actually play – we need more bands like that. Not a glaring void where my dreams used to lie.
This record is instantly forgettable – I had to listen to their first album straight afterwards to convince myself that they actually were good – once, a long time ago. The best thing about this album is when it ends – do not listen to this, do not buy it, walk away .– then hopefully they will get the message and go back to making good music.
I completely agree – this album was majorly disappointing. They’ve really gone downhill over the last few years. I enjoyed their first couple of albums so am sad they’ve come to this. A necessarily scathing review!