Miley Cyrus

The pop charts have been jam-packed with pop princesses in the past few years. Leonna, Lily, Gaga, Adele… the list is endless and it seems that 2009 will be no different. But it’s been bearable, each has had an added twist that makes them different; Winehouse is the ugly alcoholic mess, sexually confused Katy Perry is desperate to break a taboo or two, and Duffy uses her painful caterwaul to make any song a chore to listen to. So, what has Disney teen sensation Miley Cyrus got to offer? Unfortunately, not much.

Aside from embarrassing millions of adult pop star pervs when they guiltily realised she was only fifteen, Miley has relied on a pretty face, a decent voice and duping teen boppers into buying her faux Avril Lavigne take on late nineties pop punk. Much of the album is disappointingly drowned in a bland-ket of dreary Disney ballads and cringe-worthy lyrics, enough to keep mums and dads happily giving their money to the greedy puppet masters in the Disney castle.

Yet it’s not all tuneless tripe. When Miley finds a melody, the results are encouraging, ‘Breakout’ offers glimpses of a potential future Queen of Pop. ‘See You Again’ is a musical orgasm of melody polished to pure pop perfection. ‘7 things’ could soundtrack American Pie: The Divorce with it’s teenage angst and infectious chorus. And Miley’s cover of ‘Girls just wanna have fun’ is an epic modern day remix of Cyndi Lauper’s guilty pleasure numero uno.

As soon as Miley can shake off the need to please, the Disney star can quite possibly become a star in her own right. First step? Introduce her to Amy Winehouse.