If you can’t fight…

Get a big hat.

Ever heard that phrase? I have. As a young lady of part-ginger heritage, the preservation of my porcelain complexion is a time-consuming and integral part of my daily routine.

I’m always the one stuck with the bags, hiding under an umbrella and a thick layer of SPF 50 while my friends frolic in the sunshine and develop deep golden tans; however I like to tell myself that it will save on the extensive costs of cosmetic surgery in later life.

The best ally I’ve found in my war against the sun is a hat. Everybody looks good in a hat, that’s why they’re mandatory at Ascot. I like a large hat – generally, the bigger the better – as it provides good shoulder cover and I’m convinced it makes me look slimmer, so if you’re wanting to recreate that scene from My Fair Lady we discussed last time then here is your opportunity.

Topshop, ASOS

I bought a panama hat in Venice last summer and it’s become my new hat of choice for effortless cool. Designer brands often sell their versions with a signature scarf – for example the Paul Smith stripe trilby would be the elegant option, and the Jack Wills stripe trilby would be the awkward one – and it’s easy to recreate this with a charity-shop scarf and a hat you bought from the market for a fiver.
I really like this option, as it makes me feel like a thrifty rebel in the face of fashion capitalism, however if you’re really useless (or can’t bear charity shops) then get a pre-patterned style.

A hat for your boyfriend, and another quirky shield from Mister S

Aside from being a quick-fix update to your shabby accessories, scarves are really handy for those times when you’ve dared to bear but find yourself turning rapidly pink. During summer months I like to keep a scarf tied around my handbag, round my waist or round my hat just in case I need to whip it off and protect myself. Heck, if you’re SUPER-crafty you could always copy D&G and Prada and make your own scarf bag.

I always sling my scarf over my Birkin, don't you?

All in all, with the equipment shown here plus a few more key essentials (factor 50, a watermelon martini, a good book and a great poolside spot under a parasol) you’re perfectly prepared to survive a trip to the sunnier parts of the world.

While I hope I’ve converted you all into queens of skin-preservation, I’ll leave you stubborn sun-worshippers with a bit of advice my mother often gives me:
Why buy yourself a new Mulberry handbag Frances, when you can hit the sunbeds twice a week and make yourself into one?