Column: Tactical Suicide

Welcome back York! It’s time for another term of shirking lectures, drinking enough to pickle an elephant and engaging with the carnival of madness that is college sport! Last term was the beginning of a significant restructuring for football at the university with the traditional, static three-division format being ousted in favour of a more exciting relegation/promotion system.

The glorious Langwith 4ths made their way into the annals of history as they debuted in the inaugural season of Division 3. We finished a thoroughly respectable 6th overall and, if you managed to keep up with this column last term, you’ll know that this is completely in spite of the worst officiating this side of one of Andre Marriner’s nightmares.

The season ended in spectacular style as we confidently dispatched an under-strength Constantine 2nds side 10-0, a college record! The team in pink struggled to handle our dominance in possession and ultimately their lack of dedicated goalkeeper showed. Particularly embarrassing was the mishit cross from 30 yards that contrived to limp weakly between the gaping legs of the poor soul keeping net.

In the second-half, to help give the game a competitive edge, I even lent our opponents Errol Waters, our keeper for most of the past term, but unfortunately an already out-of-sorts Constantine could do little to relieve pressure on Errol and the game ended in an utter mauling.

Not every Langwith player was entirely jubilant about this result though; despite his best efforts and another strong performance in front of goal, Jack Fishwick was unable to grab a hat-trick, agonisingly hitting the post in the final five minutes with two finishes already under his belt.

All things considered though, it was a good season. It certainly wasn’t without its frustrations, but it definitely was a successful start given how many freshers were integrated into our team. The boys were a pleasure to play alongside and I’m thoroughly excited for this new term! I make no exaggeration in saying I expect to push on and challenge for promotion. Viva Langwith!