Eurovision – The Liveblog
Come Saturday, 8pm, the York Vision Eurovision Liveblog will be in full swing.
23.21
Oh and by David Laws. SEE YA SEE YA DON’T WANNA BE YA
23.20
Whilst this song plays for the final time…
Thank you to Tom McDer for allowing me to do this, thanks for our lovely web-editors for fixing all my mistakes and the webmaster for fixing everything too. Thanks especially to all of your commentary that you have given along the way. In hindsight, doing a blog to such a hectic event has been much much more complicated than what I was anticipating. It has certainly been confusing in hindsight to understand a lot of the gags that I had written when so much of it was context dependent, so I apologise in advance in case you see this tomorrow and you think most of this is shit.
Liveblogging has been a treat to do at YorkVision, and one of the things I will miss most when I le……
THE EUROVISION ANTHEM. STAND STAND STAND STAND!!!!!!!!!
Take care. See you soon.
Scott
TV Editor
23.17
Until the Eurovision Dance Contest…
23.16
CONGRATULATIONS TO OUR SUPREME EDITOR TOM MCDERMOTT FOR WINNING.
FIX!
FIX!
FIX!
FIX!
23.15
“Do you have anything you want to say to your family and friends”.
Errrr………. no.
23.14
And the winning trophy is as gash as usual.
23.13
Overall: The winner was shit.
23.13
One year they actually lost the winners and I loved it that the cameras were following them around for roughly half an hour.
23.13
Just in case, like me, you’ve forgotten the top three songs, here are the videos to remind you:
1st Place: Germany
2nd Place: Turkey
3rd Place: Romania
23.12
what? Well now that is an improvement.
23.12
And now the ten minutes of pandamonium when they all kiss and hug each other than walk downstairs, frequently mixed in with the audience to obviously fill in time. I love this bit, despite them changing the rest they can really really not fix this.
23.10
IT IS THE LAST COUNTRY. OH MY GOD THAT WAS SO PAINFUL
23.10
And we are in laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssttttt ppllllllaaaaaaaaaaaaaaccceee
Where is Andrew Lloyd Weber when you need him?
23.07
@jimnorton I have met Scott Mills. Very very orange in person. I was flustered when I talked to him so all we could talk about was about how we are both from Southampton and how we have both visited the same shoping centre.
23.06
I just can’t wait for this to be over. Another ten countries.
Lets just say that this will happen:
Clap Clap.
Germany wins.
They come down a monumentous flight of stairs.
They yell that they love you.
They pick up gong that looks like awful.
Then they sing their final song whilst bursting into tears.
Tonnes of confetti will rein from the roof.
Everyone will applaud.
Millions of names will appear from the ceiling.
Till next year.
23.02
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH US??????
23.02
12 POINTS TO MOLDOVA PLEASE
23.02
Well a nice shade of orange Scott Mills is too.
23.01
SCOTT MILLS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
23.00
Results from Switzerland:
Thanks to votes from Ireland, we are now second. Actual fuck. We are actually fucked.
23.00
From this point onwards, when we know that Germany is going to be winning, why are we bothering.
But Russia BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…
22.59
Results from Belarus
FITTIE OF THE NIGHT!!
22.57
Results from Cyprus:
Live from an airport. Well they do not have that much space.
22.56
Results from Norway
We are 3rd from bottom. LIKE A PHOENIX RISING FROM THE FLAMES.
22.55
Results from Malta:
Presented by a woman seemingly wearing what appears to be some curtains from Kath Kidston.
22.54
Results from Latvia:
“I still remember my experience from 5 years ago.” WE DON’T GIVE A TOSS.
22.53
Results from Ukraine:
Okay I take it that the men like the results coming from the Ukraine. Or the woman giving the results from the Ukraine.
22.50
I hate it that Kate Nashy type lalala woman is winning. It disgusts me.
22.49
akaidraig #eurovision Anyone notice the presenter looks like she’s about to start ironing on that table?! #eurovison
22.48
I love the talks with the runners-up. They have to talk to them and act like they may win but they really really really are screwed.
22.47
Comment Update
Dave Williams: is disappointed. The Ukraine’s entry this year wasn’t performed by a man in a silver space-suit, with melons stuffed down it. Oh, and the French performance wasn’t helium-assisted either :-(
22.46
Twitter Sensitivity Update
jonerlanc: speak english you french dicks. no one wants your language so get over it. #eurovison #esc2010
What a liberal twitter community we have.
22.46
Comment Update
well moldova aren’t going to win. forgot how utterly disgustingly political eurovision is.
I think nearly all of us here share your pain.
22.45
Germany has nailed this. Let’s all watch Babestation.
22.44
Twitter Watch
TheYoungPunx: Good 2 see the UK policy of pairing a songwriter who last had his finger on the pulse 20 yrs ago w/ an amateur singer paying off #eurovison
22.43
Twitter Watch
jonerlanc: why isn’t vatican city performing? i hear the pope does a cracking rendition of ‘danny boy’ #eurovison #esc2010
22.42
HAHAHAHA… Cyprus: 3rd to bottom, and 12 votes from your neighbour Greece.
I bloody love this.
22.41
Greece Results: A man who is obviously dealing with the ongoing eurozone crisis is giving the figures from Greece.
22.39
Third from bottom. THIS IS WHERE OUR FIGHTBACK BEGINS
22.38
Person who gives out the results watch
Jim Norton: Bloody love the guy from Estonia, why didn’t he enter?!
Because he is a git.
22.36
Here are the winners so far just to refresh your memory (with the short review I gave).
WinningGermany: Loo Break
SecondTurkey: MUST YELL
ThirdGreece: Weird Gay Nightclub.
Hope that helps. Cos it really doesn’t help me.
22.32
Is it me or have we forgotten half of the overall contestants already? Every time they hold up a flag I am like “what did they sing? / what are they doing? / why are they ahead?”
22.30
Greece, the weird gay nightclub has taken the hold from Jason Mraz.
22.29
I love it when they pass over to the Eastern European countries when the men look deadly deadly serious and speak deadly deadly pervy
22.28
The Jason Mraz man has been taking the lead so far.
22.28
The background from Germany are weirdly enacting the theme tune to Seven Nation Army by the White Stripes. What the fuck is going on?
22.26
Okay Ireland has given us 4 points. I think we can now accept by country number two that we aren’t going to win.
22.25
NEWS:
Scott Mills is doing the UK Results. Yes that’s right.
22.24
I love this element. They have the aujudicator who can see the result and knows who win… but we won’t.
FOR ANOTHER 45 MINUTES.
I love democracy. Everyone is accountable.
22.23
Okay now to turn to every single bloody country within the country.
BUT FIRST…
Let us introduce with an ultimately gash minute sequence that isn’t funny and makes no sense.
22.22
Okay enough now with all your favourites, it is time now for you guys to predict who you think is going to win.
From what you have seen so far, who is going to get the shitty architectual European gong?
22.20
This audience thing goes from very cool, to very sad, to very cool, to very sad almost instantaneously. They go to thousands of members in the audience participating and acting like mad, then they cut to what seems to be a living room in Dorking with someone old shaking their bottom like a tailfeather.
22.18
Seriously… finish this.
22.17
Okay actually all that the audience achieved is putting their hands up, not much else. I take that back. Watch the link below as it is much much better.
22.16
Okay I actually take that back. This is cool.
22.15
If you want to see a much much much better version of this, with the Black Eye Peas on Oprah, watch this. Trust me, it is amazing.
22.13
OK this is obviously the filler. But what a filler.
22.12
“Are you the best audience ever?”
Noooooooooooooooooooooo.
“Let me hear you scream as much as you can”.
(distant yelling).
22.11
Here we have with the countdown. And THE HOUR of countdowns begin.
x
22.07
Seriously there is something wrong with the Serbian man’s face.
22.06
I love this prerehearsed gush. YOU’RE ALL WINNERS.
hahahahaha
22.04
I will leave you to make up your own minds.
22.03
25. Denmark. Whaaaatt I knoooooooooooow What I knoooooooooooooooooooooow
22.03
24. Israel. That important song but we have no fucking clue what they are on about.
22.02
23. Portugal. The rejected member of the sugababes.
22.02
22. Germany. Loo break.
22.02
21. Armenia. Vote for those apricots, phowar look at her tits etc etc
22.01
20. Russia. Don’t be silly.
22.01
19. Romania. wooop de woooop
22.01
18. France. Comprehensive bottom workout.
22.01
17. Ukraine. Never should have taken off her mask.
22.00
16. Iceland. Ireland SINGER XXL.
22.00
15. Albania. Crap.
22.00
14. Turkey. MUST YELL.
22.00
13. Georgia. Dance schools.
22.00
12. UK. Good luck. REALLY GOOD LUCK
21.59
11. Greece. Weird gay nightclub.
21.59
10. Ireland. Needed alcohol.
21.59
9. Belarus. Butterflys. Vomit Inducing.
21.58
8. Serbia, Crap.
21.58
7. Belgium. The Jason Mrrrrraaaazzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz./
21.58
6. B&H. Ugly guy who needed to be at the back.
21.58
5. Cyprus. Man with the fringe. Crap.
21.57
4. MOLDOVA NEEDS TO WIN. MOLDOVA NEEDS TO WIN. OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
21.57
3. Norway. Rubbish.
21.57
2. Spain. We saw it. We hate it. We have nightmares.
21.57
1. Azerbaijan. Shit opening ballard. We hate it.
21.56
Okay here is my review of every country
21.56
It comes at this point, when we learn the amazing style of european comedy.
21.55
Okay guys… you’re favourites please.
Mine.. Moldova, Armenia.
21.54
Seriously after a song like this I would certainly enter the stage, possibly holding a weapon.
21.54
Spain Comment Watch
Daniel Goddard: FUCK OFF SPAIN
21.53
Wouldn’t it be ironic if someone came on the stage again to interupt the proceedings once again?
21.53
recurring nightmares. recurring nightmares. recurring nightmares. recurring nightmares. recurring nightmares.
21.52
Just in case you weren’t mortified enough the first time, here is that freak show once again.
21.51
ITS SIMPLY RED AGAIN
21.51
I just realised… that this isn’t the end. We have to watch Spain again.
21.50
IN A MOMENT LIKE THHISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS….
21.50
UPLIFT TIMES A BILLION TRILLION.
21.50
In a moment like thisssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss……………
21.49
“Whan I know whan a know whan I know aaaoooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwowooowww
Whan a know whan a know whan I know how to get to yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooo”
21.48
You can get so much drama from tracing paper now can’t you.
21.48
FINAL SONG.
Denmark now. And it seems as if the main blond character from Green Wing has gone and started a different pursuit
21.47
I cannot get translations as I am watching the BBC feed, but according to Paul “This song is…. weird.”
Well there you have it.
21.45
Israel’s song: I don’t know what he is on about, but I am sure that it is very nice.
21.44
Now this a powerful performace.
Eddie Ferraro as a man who is most likely to speak French, what is he on about?
21.43
Armenia Comment Watch
Rob Stonehouse: fucking apricots.
Followed by John A-H: i want to report this comment because apricots (not canned) are amazing!
21.42
In my theory, not only does portugal not have many neighbours to vote for them because they are surrounded by Spain (so they never win), their songs are crap.
21.41
Armenia Comment Watch:
Andrew Nichols: They were definitely not apricot stones, i can tell you that much.
21.40
Armenia Comment Watch
Sophie Walker: well she was chosen for two massive reasons.
21.40
Germany: Katy Perry, Lily Allen, Kate Nash… lalalalalalalaa this is life… i speak like how life is… blah blah blah
21.39
And I knew I was right. There are many many pervy mens leaving comments below.
21.38
I am back. I didn’t see that much of the Armenia entry apart from realising that men probably like seeing the contours of her breasts.
21.35
Sorry my internet cut out.
21.35
Armenia:
Okay guys if you need an opportunity to make your weekly phone call to your family, this is it.
21.31
THERE IS ONLY FIVE SONGS TO GO (plus Spain for the sixth)
21.31
Well guys that Iceland joke is not going to appease Ryanair customers.
21.30
The backstage bit is always always abysmal. And I love it.
21.30
I think this song will be Lost and Forgotten like Belarus. Remember them? Nope. Neither do I.
Can you believe that we have had twenty songs already. If we keep at this rate thren it seems as if I can beat the traffic.
21.29
Russia won’t win. Next…
21.28
Thanks very much everyone try the veal.
21.27
COMMENT OF THE NIGHT:
Andrew Nichols:
I’d quite like to Romain-in-her.
Hehe
21.26
I don’t think the woman singer can ever sit down. Too much leather. Too much.
21.25
Stonker means bad doesn’t it?
Just in case it isn’t just to emphasise that this song is WELL SHIT.
21.24
And alas Romania has come back with this stonker.
21.23
Comment watch:
Hayden: ALLEZ ALLEZ ALLEZ
21.22
Comment Watch:
Eddie Ferraro
Some may laugh, but at least the French have actually made an effort; unlike us…
21.21
This is the only place in the world where you can see body thrusts and fire explosions at the same time.
21.21
Note to Webeditors: Can you approve the comments as they come in please? Some aren’t making it to the screen.
21.20
Words cannot necessarily describe how bad this song is. Swallowing knives? Bath with the toaster?
Although I admit that this is probably the best workout for my bottom I have ever ever seen in my life.
21.19
FRANCE NOW
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
21.19
There is a reason why Evanescene never made it why it fell apart/
21.18
The Ukraine song: In hindsight I wish she left the mask on when she originally came on.
21.16
Ukraine: “Please tell me what is happening?”. No you tell us.
21.15
Comment Watch: Jim Norton
C’MON ICELAND! This is a tune, more than makes up for the banks and volcano. Looks like the singer has swallowed a bit too much ash though!
According to Martin Williams, all the songs are on Spotify already.
Great Jim. In one sentence you have made this whole contest completely pointless.
21.15
21.14
THIS IS UPLIFT NUMBER SIX OR SEVEN AT LEAST.
Jesus Christ.
21.14
UPLIFT
21.12
Is this Ireland again after a trip to KFC?
21.12
Iceland: This is another reason to REALLY REALLY REALLY hate Iceland
21.10
Sadly.. this song is better than Britain.
21.10
Sorry if your comments are taking a little bit of time to come through. I can read them still, and they will appear here soon.
*Traffic Jam*
21.09
Comment watch: “Trash gash metal ash never wins.”
What about: Hallelujah!
Now THAT was on purpose shit. I was so shit and OTT I won. ARGUMENT EFFECTIVE.
21.08
“Hullo. Hullo. Is my mic on”.
21.07
ALBANIA. This looks like a mental dentist.
21.07
Trash gash metal ash never wins.
Although remember that time about ten years ago when the Russians unexpectadely climbed the scaffolding? That was cool.
21.05
THIS SONG IS SO UNBELIEVEABLY SHIT
21.05
Nirvana watch out.
21.04
Now Turkey
21.02
Let me know your favourite so far. Moldova has got it for me.
21.01
Once this band loses… they can open their own network of gyms.
21.01
Crap pornography.
21.01
This looks very much like pornography.
20.59
Next song: Georgia chosen by Regan
20.58
Graham Norton: “I lie like a rug.”
20.58
But Graham. You just spoke. So why are you speaking. I am hearing his thoughts.
20.57
Some countries have people doing stunning acrobatics, we have two twerps who can barely make a handstand
20.56
“You bring the sunshine. I’ll bring the fun times.”
*immediately vomits dinner*
20.55
“Anything is possible.” Like Pete Waterman’s lyric writing ability.
20.55
Dwarfs in boxes. Welcome to Britain.
20.54
TBH… This is shit. But it is OUR shit.
20.54
Whenever the presenter talks about the staging when announcing the UK entry you know that it only spells defeat
20.53
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
20.53
Picks up phone
20.52
My advice: Never go to a gay club in Greece. This is what I have learnt from this song.
20.51
ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPAAAAAAAAAAA
20.51
RRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
20.51
AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
20.51
Please can someone provide a translation
20.50
OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH
20.50
OHOHOHHHOHOHOHH
20.50
OOWOWW
20.50
THIS IS IT.
20.50
11. Greece. Chosen by Paul V.
20.49
Its a standing of ovation because everyone is heading to the toliet.
20.49
UPLIFT FOR IRELAND
The fifth uplift out of ten songs so far.
20.48
This is an advert for Ireland.
All they need is the cast of Bally K and LIFE IS COMPLETE
20.47
Oh Ireland you disappoint.
20.46
Look into the eyes, the eyes, not around the eyes but into the eyes.
20.46
10. Ireland. Chosen by Andrew N
20.46
No this needs LINEDANCING
20.45
Comment Watch
I like to think rather than hiring a group of people to run around an iconic location in each country, they have got a minibus and driven a specially trained ‘crowd’ of 50 people to each capital city in turn, complete with flags and other appropriate stuff for each country.
I don’t know why I like to think that, I just do.
Gap yah?
20.45
WHERE IS THAT BLOODY EXTRACTOR FAN?
20.44
Comment watch:
Tom Hobohm: Note to self: visit Moldova.
20.44
Popstar Darius has gone abroad I see
20.43
This song:
This is like butterflys hitting an extractor fan.
20.42
Belarus: Crap
20.41
Bigger than the Olympics, this is.
INTELLIGENCE FAIL.
20.41
Sorry what happened to Spain?
20.40
Graham Norton: It wasn’t longer, it felt longer.
20.40
This song:
Strangley addicting, but so is crystal meth.
20.40
Lyric Watch:
ererererere ayayayayayay yyyyyyyyyyyyAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAYAYAAYAY ayayayayay yay YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYYAYAYAYAA
20.39
This song:
Strangley addicting, but so is crystal meth.
20.39
Lyric Watch:
ererererere ayayayayayay yyyyyyyyyyyyAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAYAYAAYAY ayayayayay yay YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYYAYAYAYAA
20.38
And this is kids, why you should never have plastic surgery
20.38
Where is his face?
20.37
Well that was a seamless transition of music style to Serbia
20.35
I tried to find a pun with mrazzz and ass.
20.35
This ain’t that bad, the audience love it.
Jason Mrazz you azzzz is uppppp
20.35
Lavatory break for the audience
20.33
Next Belgium: Peter Howes supported this BIATCH
20.32
Comment watch:
Moldova the favourite on Twitterwatch so far: http://www.tomscott.com/eurovision/
20.32
Technically for this song the backing singers should have been at the front and the guy at the back, way at the back.
20.31
Okay I won’t use the bold again. I have just screwed up the liveblog again when I spilt my rice all over the keyboard
20.30
Muse watch out
20.30
*Opening the gin*
20.29
Can someone text York Vision to our Graham please?
20.29
Jon Raymond Cook: Bosnia and Herzezrzrzrzzeeegegeeggovina
20.28
I have just gone to the toliet. I really don’t think I have missed anything.
#forgettablesong number 1
20.26
I think every man has got a better belly here than that man from Cyprus who revealed his. WHAT A GIT.
20.25
I actually got excited when he said Wales. I actually thought Wales was it
20.25
This is the only song that contains items from Ikea worn as an outfit
20.24
Comments: Daniel Goddard: Moldova FTW
20.23
I dont think the man has a girlfriend
20.22
This is what death feels like
20.22
OMFG
20.21
3. Moldova. Chosen by: Jenny McClarney
20.21
If he was a tablet I would give him a pharmacy
20.20
UPLIFT
Uplift count of the evening so far: x4
20.20
nausea
20.19
“I watch you at night”
20.19
On the dishy level, I would wash him up.
20.18
3. Norway. Chosen by somebody somewhere
20.17
Trust me those screens with the webcams are BOUND to get seedier by the time they get to England.
PHOWAR…. Chatroulette
20.17
That ending bit was deffo out of tune
20.17
WHEN WILL THIS PIECE OF UTTER UTTER CRAP END
20.16
THERE ARE TWO PEOPLE FROM SIMPLY RED.
ONE IS GOOD.
ONE IS EVI.
THEY BOTH MUST BE DESTROYED
20.16
Haha all of the dances just raped each other from behind
20.15
This is why I have not gone to Europe for three years
20.15
3 years at Rada and I am officially a shit clown performing a crap song
20.14
2. Spain. Chosen by Stephen Holcroft
Two words. Fuck me.
20.14
OH MY GOD ITS SIMPLY RED
20.13
They have started the show in the best way eurovision does:
Dramatic backflips
Powerful empty ballard
Random geeza doing backflips
Violins that aren’t playing
20.13
“I don’t want to be lost, and be lost with myself”
20.12
So that is what the guy from Boyzone with the slight beard is doing now
20.11
“You smell like lipstick”
20.11
Azerbaijan: Chosen by Ali G
Haha you have gone for the B-Grade P!nk
20.10
Just to inform you I have not listened to a single song, so I will equally be as disgusted as you when I hear them.
20.09
RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING RING
20.09
BUT I HOPE THAT THIS YEAR IT REMAINS.
Remember the CRAZY CRAZY thing with swimming pools last year.
20.08
But I love the 15 minutes of interpretative dance they do when the phones are open.
20.08
OK let us judge the judges. I think they might have some super chemistry as the night as coming along
20.07
BECAUSE WE FUCKING PAID FOR IT.
Thats why we are in the final woo woo
20.06
I always love it that in a sea of flags you see about 3 British. Bless them.
20.05
HE REALLY NEEDS TO FIX THOSE VIOLIN STRINGS
20.05
Haha… no-one can hear the bloody audience
20.05
I do think last winner made a pretty hot record.
I mean I am never going to write for Rolling Stone
20.04
This opening has officially arrived.
20.00
I think this opening bit might be a bit of crap
20.00
OF EUROVISIONYNESS
20.00
ALL RISE FOR THE NATIONAL ANTHEM
20.00
This is on the BBC HD Channel? Really. You want to see this with glitter
19.56
I NEED MY DINNER
19.54
Thnaks very much for the sweepstakes. I am just updating them now.
19.54
Sorry for the silence…
I AM WAITING FOR A CURRY.
So far I have been so desperate I have been dipping some lettuce in the fridge into a pot of curry paste. This is my life.
17.26
Feel free to continue to suggest countries and suggest your friends to fill it up too. Hopefully we can crack on with them all filled in to RAISE THE SUSPENSE SOMEWHAT MORE
17.25
If you have an EPSON PRINTER ON STANDBY then crank this amazing pdf file out
http://www.bbc.co.uk/eurovision/pdfs/party/eurovision_ispy.pdf
20.30
Hello. Scott Bryan here.
As a warm-up the event we are doing some Vision Sweepstakes. Comment below with the country you intend to win, and it will be added to the list below. The country that wins may receive a prize. I say ‘may’. I haven’t checked my bank balance all week.
Just comment below the country you want. Only one country per person please, but more than one person can go for one country.
Azerbaijan -
Spain
Norway
Moldova
Cyprus
Bosnia & Herzegovina
Belgium
Serbia
Belarus
Ireland
Greece
United Kingdom
Georgia
Turkey
Albania
Iceland
Ukraine
France
Romania
Russia
Armenia
Germany
Portugal
Israel
Denmark
Come Saturday, 8pm, the York Vision Eurovision Liveblog will be in full swing.
Don’t miss it.


moldova, clearly gonna be moldova
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As I am Catholic, please can I have Ireland.
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Romania is mine! Who doesn’t love a double piano?
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Russia
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Bosnia and Herzegovina. Two countries for the price of one.
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It’s got to be Azerbaijan, init? lovva lovva
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I’ll have Germany please Scotty.
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Greece! Or Serbia! I can’t decide, they’re both amazing!
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Armenia
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I’LL take Greece since I’m Greek. Milana – have fun with the Serbs!!
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Ok, cool! I’m half serbian anyway AND the guy’s called Milan, so it makes sense!
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Denmark usually do pretty well..
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Israel, baby
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Turkey please :)
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Hmmm… considering I’m JEWISH I should have really put my weight behind Israel. But considering they are not even in fucking Europe they should really fuck off and do a song contest with the Arab world. I’m sure they’d be very successful…
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España, gracias.
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Now Dan, I’m not sure if you have watched Eurovision before, but politics is in no way allowed to influence the way people vote.
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We’re not impartial tonight. Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy!!!
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Because I reckon we’ve got a shot, I’m going for our home country: UK please!
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These are the countries we have left:
Norway
Cyprus
Belgium
Belarus
Georgia
Albania
Iceland
Ukraine
France
Armenia
Portugal
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Portugal please!
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I think you should see this, Goose – http://www.metro.co.uk/showbiz/828393-eurovision-2010-uk-entry-is-worst-ever
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The metro must have forgotten about us when they wrote that article!
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Armenia please
And the UK entry isn’t the worst ever – we’re always poor and we’ve had worse songs!
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Actually, Dan, any member of the European Broadcasting Union can compete take part in Eurovision, so Israel has every right to compete. Algeria and Egypt could enter as well if they wanted to. Booya.
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I’m sure Dan knows that – I think he’s just suggesting that Israel is as much part of Europe as the aforementioned Algeria and Egypt. Why are they here? Because the “European Broadcasting Union” is stupid. >.>
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Belgium please!
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Shotgun Georgia.
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I’m sure there’s a joke/pun somewhere to do with York VISION… EuroVISION….. Yoruvision? Eurkovision?
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I’ll take Iceland, Scott. I’m pretty sure they won’t win after their bloody volcano wrecked most of Europe’s travel plans, but I feel sorry for them.
I did want Belgium though. I reckon Van Rompuy will somehow rig the voting system to show Nigel Farage that Belgium are in fact big boys in Europe.
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Big up “Paul from North London”. Not me though. Promise.
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I thought Norweigens were supposed to be fit? not impressed
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‘Let the best song win’, I don’t think even she believes that will happen.
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I would
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with regards to Azerbaijabn
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Did she just say ‘you smell like lipstick’. does lipstick smell?
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Ugh, really? Even with the ‘drip drop drip drop’ dance?
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Ohhhh Spain is speciaaaal.
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PITCH INVASION, or whatever the Eurovision equivalent is.
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Quote from the room: “well they [Norway]‘re not gonna win this year…”
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Your are like a sunset, behind a mountain, somewhere?
Does anyone think English might not be his first language?
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This sounds like the bloody national anthem of some depressing Eastern European country
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His English is quite good though, for a second language.
So many of the other contestants cannot sing in English at all, yet they attempt to.
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OMFG we have the winners! Moldova FTW!
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can someone please praise the amazing stage crasher in the spain entry. and MOLDOVA to win!!!
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interesting dance moves Moldovia!?!
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This song speaks to me, the amount of times I have been in an argument and said, ‘Just get away from my life’
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She’s like a cross between Gaga and Cher…… I LOVE IT.
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Moldova the favourite on Twitterwatch so far: http://www.tomscott.com/eurovision/
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I love Belgium’s choreography.
“errr maybe just kinda hop from one foot to the other out of time”
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What is that?!
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This is a poor copy of Shantel.
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oh no, we have to watch spain again!
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Oh this is like something out of Chess…. who sweepstaked thiss??
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I like to think rather than hiring a group of people to run around an iconic location in each country, they have got a minibus and driven a specially trained ‘crowd’ of 50 people to each capital city in turn, complete with flags and other appropriate stuff for each country.
I don’t know why I like to think that, I just do.
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YAY FATHERLAND LOVE.
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she looks like a lepricorn on stilts. her body shape is extremely odd.
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Okay, so we haven’t gone for the superficial, good looking young person thing. We Irish are relying on talent.
Talent and an old, rather large ginger woman.
and of course some pipes.
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Belarus: The only entrant that remembered to bring some Red Bull.
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I speak Greek :P. It’s all like “I’ve burnt up the past and everything that’s gone before” yada yada yada “I’ve paid all my dues…. OPAA!” etc. Odd.
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We were shocking. The backing singers were grunting rather than singing, me ears couldn’t take it!!! Josh did well though, but we won’t do half as well this year with that!
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moldova all the way. i’m hoping for it to come on spotify soon.
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“Trash gash metal ash never wins.”
Hallelujah!
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this blog and contest is so unbelievably CR*P!
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Seriously people, don’t even consider voting for Greece. If we wanted/could afford to win, we wouldn’t have sent a bunch of booing gay Droogs.
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I think Iceland couldn’t send a candidate following the volcanic ash so they reused Ireland’s entry…
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C’MON ICELAND! This is a tune, more than makes up for the banks and volcano. Looks like the singer has swallowed a bit too much ash though!
According to Martin Williams, all the songs are on Spotify already.
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Love the live blog scotty
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Emily Fairbairn wants me to ask if she can have Maldova.. I consider this cheating as it was quite clearly musical genius.
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Ukraine are party poopers, where’s the cheesy euro disco pop?!
It’s all gone a bit Evanescence…
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i muted ukraines odd entry song and just listened to moldova again.
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Samantha Cowley: I feel like he would want to hump all of us
Mike: Including me
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damn, France is even worse than our troglodytes.
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Some may laugh, but at least the French have actually made an effort; unlike us…
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ALLEZ ALLEZ ALLEZ
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That’s the most amazing piano!
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I’d quite like to Romain-in-her.
Hehe
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Bloody loved France, going to download that.
Big fan of one half of Romania, cracking outfit and he’s a great singer!
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Me too, Andy, me too…
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russia couldn’t even afford a real photograph of a woman for him to look at. this is just a bunch of peasants.
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The Russian Fleet Foxes…
They missed a trick not getting this guy to do their entry: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RUaYbfKZIiA
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well she was chosen for two massive reasons.
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Dirty Norwegians: closing up on the (very nice) cleavage of Armenia.
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They were definitely not apricot stones, i can tell you that much.
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Gernany’s Lena strangely resembles Amy Pond. Not bad…
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Lena from Germany sang two Kate Nash songs on the idol show “Our star for Oslo” which Germany put on to find a contestant
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I don’t know if this has been mentioned, but press the red button and you get the lyrics at the bottom of the screen.
Me and Martin have been singing along, great fun. Martin has begun dancing as well.
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@Jim you also get translations! :). This song is…. weird.
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is that red button only on the remote control?
i am watching online on iplayer..is there a button for translation for that too?
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N’evergreen? Has he been kicked in the nads? This is like a drunken Starship’s “Nothing’s going to stop us now”, meets Tina Turner’s “Simply the Best”. Still, at least it’s in tune, ahem, Britain!
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that guy doing a handstand is amazing. UK couldnt even attempt that.
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FUCK OFF SPAIN
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I’m NOT in love, with this fairy-tale…
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@Marlies, it was on the remote control I’m afraid. Just had a look and can’t see it on iplayer.
The last song’s chorus translated as:
“Something tny, oh oh ohhhh, something really small, oh oh ohhhh”
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@Jim: cheers. would have been rather late anyway…
My favourites: Germany and Moldova
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Im quite a fan of Cyprus, Ireland and yes Moldova again.
No matter how long I look at the Serbian guy’s face I still can’t work it out.
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Top 4: France, Germany, Albania, and Iceland.
Worst singer: Israel
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The Greece singer looks like my hairdresser.
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top: moldova (obvs!), france, and romania (its stuck)
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Serbia will take this home. Blatantly. MILAN!
Also, Erik the host is really the true star of the night.
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@Jim
explains a lot.
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i vomitted a little with the best audience nonesense
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Russia won two years ago – Norway last time.
So that’s the Eastern Block, then Scandinavia – so a Balkan Country to win this time?
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I’d say Moldova, France, Germany and probably Denmark, power-ballad heaven.
Is it me, or would the Moldova entry mix well (read: is it vaguely plagiarising the Guru Josh Project’s “Infinity”?
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Moldova will winnnn but I don’t know much else. We’ve done a group sweepstake in the flat and I have Iceland, Armenia, Belarus and Denmark. I have no hope.
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I wonder who will be the person reading out the results and where they will be?
I’m thinking, it will be Fearne Cotton, and the backdrop will be the Thames.
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Bloody love the guy from Estonia, why didn’t he enter?!
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eurgh, this is so sickly political. surely there should be something against a girl singing a platinum single.
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BOO POLITICS.
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OMG Ukraine.
I love Eastern Europe.
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@jonerlanc on Twitter
Now, now: Freedom of Speech, whatever language it may be in.
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Iceland was my fitty for the night!
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How much make up has Scott Mills managed to fit on his face tonight?! Too much, he looks like he’s in drag.
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i’d like to think that i would boycott this next year. but i hate to admit i love this crap.
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Nice one Germany! I won’t gloat about my spectacular win but I will be round in a bit to collect my winnings. It’s £2 per person, yeah?
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why does the yorkvision font keep changing?
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Because I am shit with the formatting. I apologise.
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I was only slightly wrong with my choice of Romania (which I based entirely on the fact that it was the first one on my youtube recommendations) so I am quite chuffed.
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bring back rybak
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I’m with Jenny.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8JRtGMBUz0
387 points! Suck it Germany!
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